Ending a relationship can be an incredibly painful thing to go through. If you are the one who has had to make the decision to leave, finding your feet in a new place maybe with children in tow is enough to deal with without worrying how you will make ends meet without your partner to help. It can be just as difficult for the one left at the home you once shared, wondering how you will manage paying for it all yourself.
Once you have worked out how much money you need to live each month as you are and compared this to how much you have, decide whether you need to reduce your outgoings, increase your income or perhaps a bit of both.
Assuming you are now the only adult at home now, you can reduce your council tax bill straightaway by ringing the council and explaining the change in circumstances.
Now that there are less clothes to wash and one less person to cook for, you could look to reduce your energy bills. If you had a tumble dryer, consider if you still need one now or whether you could manage with a washing line and airing rack to save on the electricity bill. When cooking, chop vegetables into smaller chunks so that they cook faster and therefore require less energy. If you find yourself in the habit of cooking a certain amount and have leftovers, save it to create another meal the next day or just eat leftovers. When reheating leftovers, get into the habit of using the microwave to avoid wasting energy pre-heating the oven or spending more by using the hob.
At Christmas, birthdays, Weddings or any other event where you are obliged to get a gift, remember you’re buying just from you now and not from two people so don’t feel pressured to spend the same amount as you have done previously if you can’t afford to keep doing it. Most people experience some sort of financial pressure in their lives so won’t expect you to buy loads, and nobody that matters would want you to put yourself under financial strain for the sake of a gift anyway.
This can be a tricky one if you have children and you are facing your first Christmas alone, particularly if you cannot afford the nice things you are all used to having at Christmas. If you are happy then the children will be happy too. So put on a smiley face and get creative – think up some new family traditions you can begin this year that don’t cost much and your children will look forward to you doing again next year. I asked some single parent friends what they get up to at Christmas and had some great ideas – from Elf on the shelf bringing breakfast on Christmas eve complete with balloons (card factory do a cheaper version of elf on a shelf), Christmas eve boxes to begin the fun earlier than usual, having Christmas party food for lunch instead of doing a big dinner so you have more time to play with them and their new toys to simply gift wrapping the doorway to your living area before you go to bed so they can ‘break in’ to find their presents – a fun way to start the day!
Many newly singles want to keep their home but are unsure if it is possible without two incomes to help pay for it. If you own your own home and want to keep it, consider whether once your ex’s belongings have gone whether you could free up a room and get a lodger.
Most people usually end up having to replace some household items as you can’t both take the hoover, microwave etc. To fork out less for the things you need, have a look on websites such as gumtree to see what is being sold cheap near you. Even if you want to buy new, you can buy things one by one as and when you can afford it later, but at least you can manage for now. I furnished my first home – a 2 bedroom flat, for £100 ten years ago using only things I had found on gumtree for sale. Sellers often sell quality items very cheaply just because they don’t want to take it when they move house so if you are not used to buying second hand, don’t assume it is all rubbish. My flat was very nicely furnished and I had fun upcycling some of the furniture with paint to make it just how I wanted. Another advantage to shopping for furniture in this way is that you don’t have to struggle to assemble it all by yourself – particularly useful if you relied on your ex to put things together!
If you’re not used to watching your spending, contact your bank to see what alert services they offer to notify you once your balance goes under a certain amount. For example, HSBC will send you a text message for free once your balance goes below £200 or any other amount you decide. Always check your account balance if you're unsure whether you have enough money to cover a transaction. If you do incur bank charges and are in receipt of benefits, contact your bank and explain you are in financial difficulty and they are likely to refund some or all of your bank charges. They can also freeze interest on your account, for more information contact your bank as soon as possible if you are concerned you may be in this position and obtain advice. Not putting funds into your account the same day as you exceed any overdraft facility and having interest frozen will have a detrimental effect on your credit rating which may affect your ability to borrow money in future.
Personally, I have found that since living on my own I see far more of my friends than when I was living with a partner as they do not feel they are intruding. If you friends can help you out, and you can return the favours, see if you can save money on things such as haircuts, manicures, paying a painter and decorator and also going out. Staying in is cheaper than going out and more fun if you have friends round. I have a friend who is a hairdresser that cuts my hair when she stays round and in return I supply her with loads of boys toys that my son no longer wants for her to give to her son who is a few years younger than mine.
If you are still short on cash and need to earn some more, you may feel that you now have time for a second job not that you don’t have to give up time for your ex. You may want to use this as a way to get out and meet people socially such as doing a couple of evening working in a bar, or if you find yourself stuck at home alone in the evenings if you have young children then you could use this time to turn a hobby into a business or do some other type of work from home. There are loads of things you could do and I am sure google will give you hundreds of ideas if you were to search, such as selling arts and crafts on Etsy, baking cakes, picking up and delivering people’s ironing just to name a few.
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Last updated: 31 January 2020 | © KIS Bridging Loans 2024 | Terms & Conditions